I don’t know about you, but I have been feeling the weight of a mid-semester slump. Hard. This part of the semester never fails to show me that I need to learn how to regulate my emotions, as every prelim, presentation and minor inconvenience makes me question my entire existence. Even though I feel like you’re meant to learn the opposite in college, being a student at Cornell has conditioned me to strive for perfection — not just my best effort.
Some may think this is a positive development. I am here to personally report that it’s not. Believe it or not, copious amounts of stress while you’re trying to take a test actually aren’t good for your performance. They’re even worse for your mental health.
I am the person who calls her mom to make her feel better when it feels like the world is ending. And usually, my mom is the perfect person to grant me some clarity in the midst of extreme overreaction. But sometimes, she’ll hit me with the classic: “It’s okay, Maia. You don’t need perfect grades. You don’t need a summer internship. You will be fine.” Though there’s nothing else that she could possibly say to convey the intended message, it tends to strike a chord of frustration in me. I have to stop myself from responding, “You just don’t get it.” I know she means well.
It’s hard to truly internalize her message when every day here feels like an academic fight to the death. But no matter how much my brain tries to fight it, the fact is she’s right. I will be fine. As my roommate likes to say, I’m a girl who’s going to be okay.
So, to celebrate that everything will eventually fall into place, and that no grade I receive is actually career-defining, I am working toward bringing more whimsy into my life, especially as the universe has finally begun to bless us with warmer weather. The first sprinkle of whimsy I’m implementing is saying yes to things. Though I think I am already pretty good at this, there is always room for improvement. I am not going to say no to things happening after 11 p.m. just because I convince myself I’ll be in bed and asleep before then. We all know that I won’t be — I will likely just end up doomscrolling on social media late into the night, when I could be hanging out with the people I love. The best nights of sleep always end up being after hours of belly laughs.
In the same vein, hosting people at my apartment has become my personal mission this semester. It’s something I loved doing in high school, and ever since I’ve gotten my hands on Partiful (the modern version of Evite), I can’t stop thinking about all the different events that could possibly justify having people over. Sometimes, it just feels good to have people show up for you in your own space (even if enticed with refreshments). The planning of it all is also a wonderful distraction from my daily stressors.
I have also discovered new, basic ways to partake in self-care. Reading physical books before I go to bed has been a game changer, and the fact that the books are on loan from my roommate makes it even more special. I love reading her recommendations and sharing our excitement for the characters and plots. Also before bed is the addition of my skincare routine (I’m not saying it’s new and improved because I’ve actually never had one before). Not only is it relaxing, but it’s an intentional moment where I prioritize how I am treating my body. On top of that, seeing it work has been equally gratifying.
Finally, though it’s always nice to have a constant in my life, changes within the crevices of my day-to-day monotony have been just as important for me. This can be as simple as changing my nail polish color as soon as the old coat chips, or listening to new music (thank you, Harry Styles). Even switching up my grocery list every once in a while to make room for a new dish brings color into my world when everything feels (and looks) gray. It’s within these changes that I start to feel like myself again. I love who I am in the classroom and at work. But I see myself more in my loved ones, my hobbies and the olive green nail polish I choose to sport around.
Maia Mehring is a junior in the School of Industrial and Labor Relations. She can be reached at mmehring@cornellsun.com.
