In the modern age of being disconcertingly attached to screens, a moment inevitably arrives in which all ties to the digital world are severed: when you are actively being ghosted. Getting ghosted, in my opinion, can be synonymous with a number of things: being left on delivered by your situationship, in a back-and-forth Snapchat argument with a friend or receiving a bone-chilling “can we talk …” message.
In any circumstance, you are incapable of being proactive about it because utter chaos is unfolding around you. No comparable universal experience matches the unbearably overstimulating environment one must endure while genuinely dying on the inside. Let’s get into some hypothetical (real) examples, shall we?
1. Katrina & The Waves: “Walking On Sunshine”
On the only Saturday morning you had absolutely nowhere to be, you wake up to your mother blathering about the interminable list of responsibilities you are supposedly behind on. Before you’ve even opened your eyes, she has whisked you into the passenger seat of her car for an alleged “quick errand.” Shockingly, this transforms into a three-and-a-half-hour food-shopping excursion. When you finally get a chance to check your notifications-less phone, the radio screeches the unrelatable lyrics “I used to think maybe you loved me now baby I’m sure.”
2. Kristen Bell, Santino Fontana: “Love Is an Open Door - From Frozen / Soundtrack Version”
You are smack-dab in the middle of a five-year-old's playroom. Thinking you are babysitting two kids, you watch six sprinting, sugar-high kindergarteners spawn out of thin air. Not only is every square inch of the floor scattered with toys, but countless pets crawl around, including a turtle, three bunnies and a few other unidentified creatures (I hope my neighbors don’t find this article). And just as Anna and Hans start belting “say goodbye to the pain of the past” on the TV, you step, barefoot, directly onto a LEGO.
3. Paramore: “Ain’t It Fun”
It’s 5 p.m., and at your summer waitressing job, this translates to a very unhappy happy hour. Not only have you been temporarily demoted to bussing tables, meaning there will be no tips to make up for the role’s suspiciously low pay, but there is a sudden rush of very hangry customers. Just as you notice your only tolerable co-workers aren’t in attendance today, you accidentally knock an entire pitcher of Sangria into a customer’s lap. To close your 10-hour shift, you are forced to single-handedly wash an entire restaurant's worth of dishes. Left alone to spiral about a certain someone who hasn’t texted, Paramore temptingly whispers from the kitchen speakers, “Don’t go crying to your mama.”
4. Carly Rae Jepsen: “Call Me Maybe”
Although the ability to travel is an incredible privilege, departure day tends to have its flaws. Hours after leaving the airport, your family hasn’t arrived at their destination and is stranded in a foreign city where no one speaks English. It is scorching hot, and you are wearing sweatpants, yet for reasons unknown, your parents refuse to stop for water. Every couple of minutes, your dad interrogates everyone about our lack of an international plan, ensuring all phones are still on airplane mode. With no service whatsoever, you shuffle-play your outdated Spotify downloads, filling your headphones with “I threw a wish in the well.” Oh, and by the way, your luggage is missing too.
5. Andy Williams: “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year”
There is nothing quite like Family Movie Night, especially when the unspoken rules are as follows: phones are prohibited, the majority of the time is spent fighting over what to watch and a movie that none of us even like and have seen at least four times — often Home Alone — is picked. Bonus points if as “Hearts will be glowing when loved ones are near” is caroled you receive a notification from the single most random person on planet Earth, followed by an immediate confiscation of your phone until the end of the 103-minute movie.
6. Nathan Lane, Ernie Sabella, Jason Weaver, Joseph Williams: “Hakuna Matata”
Woohoo! It’s your cousin’s seventh birthday party, and you finally arrive at BounceU after a car ride spent in standstill traffic. Unfortunately for you, there are zero relatives your age here! Every couple of minutes, little kids somehow slam into you, no matter how awkwardly you've isolated yourself in the corner. Your phone buzzes off the hook, all notifications sourced from an extremely inactive group chat. Every time you try to sneak a peek at your phone to see what’s going on, your dad hits you with a lethal death-stare from across the room, indicating that you should put it away. In the background, Pumbaa’s voice blares, “No worries for the rest of your days.” Just as you begin to collect yourself, your grandmother decides to skip the pleasantries and inquire about your current relationship status.
7. Weezer: “Island In The Sun”
After a chaotic night out and four hours of sleep, there couldn’t be a better time to reconnect with nature than on a morning kayak trip with your family. Instead of sleeping in and regretting the night’s decisions at a reasonable hour (noon), you get to do it bright and early. Although paddling makes your arms feel like they are going to fall off, you are thankfully distracted by the swarm of bugs attacking your legs. “We’ll be playing and having fun” looms in the direction of a passing booze cruise while you are genuinely debating drifting to shore. After an hour out, it starts to torrential downpour, and your freshly blown-out hair becomes collateral damage.
This upbeat playlist is absolutely the last thing you should listen to if you are going through it. After reflecting on these overstimulating moments, I think the biggest ridiculousness of it all might be how much power we, as a society, allow a simple notification to hold over us. As irritating as they can be, maybe these moments are exactly what we need to heal a digital heartbreak.
You can find the playlist here.
‘Solar Flare’ is a weekly playlist column where Sun contributors spotlight a slice of musical taste with the campus community. It runs every Monday.
Emma Robinson is a member of the Class of 2027 in the College of Arts and Sciences. She is a staff writer for the Arts & Culture department and can be reached at erobinson@cornellsun.com.
