By Jess Agran
As someone who is single, there is nothing more exciting than a first date. The excitement of a new person, a potential beginning of something great or, worst case scenario, a funny story. It's the topic of all the best debriefs and your remittance for all your couple friends. And yet there is one daunting aspect that can feel like it determines the trajectory of the date: the dress code. Agonizing over picking out the perfect outfit while maintaining an elusive yet personable “cool girl” vibe is nothing short of war.
Now of course, this is no easy formula, there are stakes here. In our modern age finding the next intriguing, fun, extravagant thing is commonplace. While a classic dinner is always enjoyable, you never know when you might fall into the trap of a gym date or netflix-and-chill disguised as “let me make you dinner.” Whatever it might be, the outfit must answer two critical questions: do you look hot, and do you feel hot? The worst thing you can do is stray too far out of your comfort zone, only to be fidgeting all night. Now getting your clothes off ASAP may be an incentive, depending on how your night will go (and power to you if that's how you boogie), but that is often not the case.
I believe that to have the perfect first date outfit, you must have a rotation of pieces that you can mix together that are tried and true. For me, it's a mini skirt and loose top combination that I feel hot as hell in with a pair of boots (so good you could drool over). Having a rotation of date night pieces that can be matched to fit the occasion is necessary. Whether it is a coffee date in the midst of a warm fall or Plum Tree sushi dinner date smack dab in the middle of winter, these outfits must mold to the occasion. So let me give you the guide to curating your perfect date outfit, because if you're reading this, then you're definitely hot enough — let's just throw on some confidence.
Some might say that choosing a shoe or makeup look is going to be the hardest part of this decision process… but they would be wrong. The correct answer is: pants! Those tricky little f*ckers are the bane of my existence when picking outfits. My reasoning (and so many others’) is grounded in the issue of sitting down. A pair of slacks may look perfect when you are standing in front of the mirror, but once you sit, things can go downhill. Consideration of the crotch bunching effect, riding up weirdly or gaping in the back are all ailments we must consider. Have you ever sat down and noticed your jeans are oddly bunched up in the pelvic area—riding up and down more than your emotions the day before your period? Or maybe once you sit, you feel that horrifying breeze way too low on your back and you are acutely aware of your underwear all of a sudden? It sucks. So make sure your choice is an incident-free one. Go through your wardrobe and figure out which pants are date-approved. And do not be fooled, this will go for shorts as well, no one is safe to the matter of jean proportions. Personally, I have a few pairs of jeans that I adore; I know that they fit, I feel good in them and I know no wardrobe malfunctions will occur. Of these pants, I have a wide leg mid rise light wash, a low waisted mid wash bootcut and a fun dark wash barrel jean. Now of course, these represent and align specifically with my style, so yours may differ. But the important takeaway is that I know no issues will occur, and they make me feel comfortable in every situation. Long skirts are always a safe bet as well, and I recommend investing in a skirt that is a solid color that you love (for me it's a thrifted silk midi skirt).
Next, the top. While you don’t have to follow this order, I find that tops can really set the tone of the outfit. Finding a piece that sums up your personality can be daunting; the pressure put on a piece of fabric is criminal. Instead, think of one thing that you want to exude; this can be simply physical, like if you have a hot collar bone, or it may fall more into personality, maybe florals accentuate your green thumb. These are often tops that you gravitate towards and love as they are. They can also act as a discussion piece (if your nerves are getting the best of you). At the end of the day, it is about whatever makes you feel comfortable. For many, this is dressing a bit more modest, putting forth the most classy version of themself (even if it's a blatant lie). While black is a staple color scheme, I usually reach for tops that have fun textures, colors or cuts. For different weather conditions, these range from 90s style tanks to fitted sweaters. The consideration towards the top is far more important than the look. I have a lilac spaghetti strap tank that was my mom’s from the 90s (thank you, mother) that is a no-brainer because it speaks to my love of fashion and compliments my skin tone. And let's be honest, I look damn good.
Finally, we have my favorite part — shoes. I believe a shoe can make or break an outfit. Carrie Bradshaw had it right in her unquenchable thirst and constant hunt for footwear. There is nothing better than a slutty little sling back kitten heel. Throw those on with jeans, and you're golden. Whatever you choose, please for the love of God, make sure you can walk in them. Nothing ruins the mood more than face planting in front of Dos Amigos. The time you spend sitting should directly correlate with the level of discomfort the shoe provides. A sexy heel and sit down dinner, while forged in hell, is perfection.
I decided to organize a battle of the sexes comparing guys and girls in their experience, so I decided to falter to my trusty panel, picking three single girls and three single guys. In my research (prodding relentlessly at the social lives of my friends with interviews) both agreed that the situation and context of the date mattered greatly in their apparel consideration. Everyone’s first date uniform was different, but there was one commonality — everyone was desperate to put their best self forward. One of my sources defined this as dressing as the person you want to be rather than who you are. I found that eerily profound in its commentary. From my studies, I found that girls get ready double to triple the time of men. And there is a general pull towards the color black and jeans, both sleek outfit staples, as they have the most gravitational elements. An interesting discovery was the consideration of the counterpart's aesthetic and personality. Multiple sources explained that this consideration may be rooted in the other person's overall vibe, appearance and distinctive personality traits. It's easy to point fingers, comparing guys and girls, but in the end, we're all just trying to make a connection.
In this deep dive into the first date ensemble, I hope I was able to shed light on the formulation of the perfect outfit. Whether you are a big shirt-little bottom or tiny top-big pant person, picking what you feel best in is the most important part. There may not be a perfect answer, but making decisions based on what instills the most confidence in you is about as close as it gets.
Jess Agran is a sophomore in the College of Human Ecology. She can be reached at jba76@cornell.edu.