By Sneha Singhi
Dear Incoming First-Years,
As the semester reaches its end, I have to come to terms with something that I’ve been putting off for a while now: the beginning of the end. My senior year.
As I look back on my time at Cornell, I am filled with a lot of mixed feelings; this school taught me things that I never thought I would learn. And, the actual education is just a tiny part of it. A part of me is filled with happiness and gratitude for all the lifelong lessons I’ve learned, people I’ve met, experiences that have changed me to be a stronger person. But, a part of me is also filled with regret. There are many things that I wish I did differently in college — decisions I made that almost ruined my life. But at the end of all of that, Cornell has taught me lessons that have changed me to my core.
I think of myself as someone who is trying to rise from the ashes; in the beginning of my college experience, I lost myself and what makes me special. I fell into a dark place and was at my absolute lowest last semester. I’d never wish that kind of experience on anyone. Yet, some wise people once told me that you can only rise when you fall. And that is my motto for the rest of my college experience.
As someone who romanticized college in my senior year of high school, my heart was broken as to how it turned out. But, I’m trying to move on. And by doing so, I hope to give all my underclassmen and incoming first-years some advice, so here we go.
#1: Choose classes based on your genuine interests — not on what someone tells you to do.
Cornell is famous for its wide variety of classes, with options ranging from ice cream making to wine tasting. In your freshman year, explore! Take courses that sound fun, random or even a little weird. That’s how you discover what lights a fire in you.
There’s so much pressure to treat college like a race — pick your major early, load up on requirements and stay “on track.” But what does that even mean? You’re never behind if you’re learning about yourself along the way. And while Cornell’s grade deflation is real, I believe that when you’re motivated by interest instead of fear, you end up doing better. Passion creates momentum. Even if you don’t get the grade you hoped for, at least you walk away with knowledge, perspective and maybe even a new curiosity unlocked. You won’t get many chances in life to learn just for the sake of it. Don’t waste that opportunity.
2: Grades are not everything.
Every one of us came to Cornell with incredible academic achievements — that’s why we’re here. But suddenly, you’re surrounded by students who’ve founded nonprofits, published research and started businesses. It’s easy to feel like you’re falling behind or not enough to begin with.
Comparison becomes second nature here, but it’s also one of the most toxic habits you can fall into. I’ve learned that your GPA isn’t the only thing that defines you, even if it feels that way sometimes. Your character, work ethic, relationships and the risks you take to grow matter just as much — if not more.
That’s not to say academics don’t matter. But sacrificing your mental health, sleep or joy for a perfect GPA isn’t worth it. The pressure will always be there, but give yourself grace. You’re allowed to have off days. You’re allowed to focus on learning, not just performing.
3: Don’t go too crazy with your newfound freedom.
College feels like a different world — you’re in charge of everything. No one tells you when to eat, sleep or study. It’s your first taste of adulthood.
And that freedom can get to your head. Especially for students from a school like Cornell, where most of us were nerds in high school, the idea of partying and going out can become a little overwhelming. And while there’s nothing wrong with having fun, don’t lose sight of why you’re here.
College isn’t all about fun, despite what the stereotype says. It’s about discovering who you are and laying the foundation for your future. Sometimes that means choosing work over parties and prioritizing school. Fun will always come. College won’t.
4: Be able to say no.
This might sound obvious, but it’s harder than you think. When you’re new, you want people to like you. You want to make long-lasting friends who you’ll laugh with 30 years from now. Because of this, you might find yourself in situations that don’t feel right.
I remember one night freshman year, when my new friends wanted to go out, but I had an essay due. I didn’t want to seem boring, so I rushed the paper and went out. The party was average. The essay? Not great. Looking back, it wasn’t worth it.
Saying no doesn’t make you boring. It means you respect your own time and energy. People who truly care about you will understand that. And if they don’t? They probably aren’t worth keeping around.
5: Don’t waste time on people who don’t value you.
When you’re constantly surrounded by people, it’s easy to want to be “good” with everyone, maybe even friends with everyone. But in that process, you might start putting more effort into relationships than others are giving back. That goes for friendships, relationships, situationships, etc.
And because of that, some people may take advantage of you. It’s important to remember your worth and not waste energy on people who don’t genuinely care about you. There are thousands of students at Cornell. You will find your people, even if it’s not in your freshman or sophomore year.
You might meet them when you least expect it. But trust that there are people out there who will value you fully, for who you are.
6. Try everything — even if it scares you.
College is one of the few times in life when you’re surrounded by thousands of opportunities: clubs, classes, research, dance troupes, business competitions, acapella groups, cultural shows. Say yes to things you’ve never done before. Take risks. Be awkward. Be a beginner.
I used to be scared of looking dumb or out of place, but some of my best memories came from the moments I threw myself into something new. You don’t need to be good at something to try it. You don’t need to stick with everything you sign up for. But you owe it to yourself to at least see what’s out there.
Some of the experiences that will shape you the most won’t be in a classroom or library. They’ll be in the unexpected adventures — the random info sessions, the club you didn’t plan to join, the new friend you met by accident. Try everything. You’ll surprise yourself.
These are the six lessons I wish I’d known and now live by. I’m grateful for Cornell, even through the hardest parts. Getting through them while still showing up for myself is something I’ll carry with pride long after I leave this place.
With love,
A Rising Senior Who’s Still Figuring It Out
Sneha Singhi
Sneha Singhi is a junior in the College of Arts and Sciences. She can be reached at ss3298@cornell.edu.
