Sitting in Libe Café pretty much every day of the week has given me some insight into the most efficient ways to forget about a paper, prelim or quiz. All you have to do is look around, notice the mass of people jamming away on their laptops, appearing to do serious work. Most are probably on Facebook, gossiping about those Victoria’s Secret angels at a Halloween bash this past weekend. Some will be trying to appear intellectual by reading The New York Times. A noble few might even be doing actual schoolwork, while also chatting with 10 other people on Gchat.

As I was making my daily trek up the Hill to my office at Helen Newman Hall I became distracted by a slight bulging apparent on my right moccasin. Slightly concerned, I removed my shoe (or “slipper,” as my boss prefers to call them) and was deeply chagrined to discover that the entire right half of the lovely faux-something (Leather? Suede? Very unclear) had separated from the sole. Truly tragic.

Because of exhibition and non-league games, it is too early to effectively break down most aspects of team play. Thus, our column today focuses on four different subjects many fans may have overlooked this weekend.

Delay Hurts Ivy Programs

Although Friday night’s game was the first of the season for Cornell, it was Niagara’s fifth. Teams like Denver and Miami-Ohio have now played eight games to Cornell’s one. Even in Cornell’s own conference, ECAC Hockey, the six non-Ivy teams have all played at least five games.

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.

Okay, so maybe it was. Maybe I had predicted this would come about every year since 2005. But still, it was always an ideal –– much like a Kobe/LeBron NBA Finals. I never entertained the possibility that it would actually come to fruition, much less that I would have to choose a side.

Well, I must have clairvoyant tendencies to some degree, because as I am penning this column my two favorite teams –– the New York Yankees and the Philadelphia Phillies –– are preparing to take the field in what promises to be a World Series to remember. Sabathia vs. Lee. A-Rod vs. Howard. Pinstripes vs. ... pinstripes?

What does Halloween mean to you? If you’re reading the Sports section, it probably signifies the start of the NBA season. With that in mind, I’ve combined the best parts of fall into Halloween-based awards for the start of the 2010 NBA season.

This is my third and final column about the high risk, high yield option of wearing a sports-themed costume for Halloween. I hope that my ideas have served you well over the years, at least to entertain if not on a practical level.

What do Cornell Sports and Andy Warhol have in Common?

It must be said –– I’m all about making connections. And for the record, I’m not just talking about the connections that score me a summer internship with Comcast SportsNet (looking at you, Dan Baicker). Or the connections that result in 2009 World Series tickets for yours truly; oh wait, I have yet to actually establish that one (which is why I’m going to use this opportunity to solicit two tickets for one of the Series games in Philadelphia next week. One for me, and one for my friend, coworker and fellow Phillies devotee, Meredith Bennett-Smith. Please, email me if you can be of service! I guarantee a column shoutout).

Depression. That’s right, the D word. You know, I’ve got to hand it to Yankees fans, depression is tough. I think it’s something you learned from your counterparts in Boston, especially after that loss to the Marlins in 2004. That was the last time the pinstriped knights from the Bronx were even close to being World Champs. I can understand why you’ve been depressed.

Welcome back everyone. The very fact you’re reading this column means that Cornell somehow dragged you back to Ithaca. I’m sure most of us will admit that wherever we were for the past few days was a great alternative to the windswept tundra that the Arts Quad has become. Well, unless you’re from the northeast I guess this is just what you have to live with.

Apparently, there’s a clause within A.J. Burnett’s five-year $82.5 million contract that stipulates who he will and who he will not throw to. The latest adventure of Burnett’s inconsistent 2009 inaugural campaign with the New York Yankees has career backup catcher Jose Molina tabbed to catch Burnett in Game 2 of the ALDS tonight against the Minnesota Twins. Normally, I would not devote my column to a backup catcher, but when he replaces Jorge Posada, one of the premier offensive catchers in the last decade, I could not resist.