A decade after Y2K, the curse of the New Year’s Resolution has failed to become achievable even as I have become older and discovered that vague goals such as “spread karmic goodness” and “reinvent self” have reached the point of utter ambiguity.

Full Disclosure: Yes, I went to the new Urban Outfitters just outside the Commons. And yeah, I did some shopping there. OK. A lot of shopping there.

If you’re thinking I caved, well, you can go suck it. I entered, in part, because I wanted to capitalize on at least a few menially styling summer duds so I wouldn’t look absolutely tragic during my fall classes; but also, I hit up the ’Ban (as it is sure to be called ... trust me ... it will catch on) to capitalize on the fact that I would have only two short months to wear something that could be considered, in theory, somewhat, and to a very, very limited extent, unique.

It’s spring (purportedly) and there’s growth sprouting all around — and I don’t just mean on the Arts Quad, I mean on the faces of men, young and old, on campus and all around the world. Many news and celebrity outlets have been commenting on the resurgence of facial hair, especially among younger populations. Celebrities like Brad Pitt, Christian Bale, Johnny Depp and Jake Gyllenhaal (the list goes on and on) are sporting various types of facial hair, and they are growing it on your average Joe -Plumber, -Hipster, and everything in between.

Since you might not be buying new Trina Turk tops and Tory Burch sandals for spring break this year due to the recession or a yanked trip to Mexico, I am going to rant this week about America’s Next Top Model. Yes, this is a fashion column geared to the Cornell community, but I thought that in the spirit of vacation I’d take a break from ripping into the campus clothing mistakes. So this week, feel free to fake ’n bake or wear leggings inappropriately without risking a call out on your orange glow in print.