Overgrown quads crawling with ticks. Cracked sidewalks unplowed in mid-winter: impassable. Showers caked with inch-thick mold. Classrooms dusty, dirty and unkempt. Dorm bathrooms still reeking of last weekend’s now-hardened vomit. Dining hall buffets empty. Scared, starved students calling out to mommy in bewilderment. A university unhinged, rendered inert.

This description of life without Cornell workers is overly dramatic, of course. A lame attempt at shock and awe. But what would become of our school without the services provided by these workers? How much are their services worth?